Last week was probably the saddest week of my life so far. I’m not going to state what it was on this blog because 1. This blog is read by a lot of people who I know and 2. I don’t really want to tell people and be like ‘poor old me’. Funnily enough, it has nothing to do with my mental health really however it has made it worse.

I still feel pretty numb about it but there is times where it kicks in and I want to shout or cry, it’s at the most random of times.

Life is sucky at the moment but I know after all of it is concluded and has a plan to figure it out, I’ll be fine. But now, I just want my life back to normal, however, I know it will never be the normal that I felt only a few weeks ago.

It’s weird to think that only one or two things can be slightly changed that everything, literally everything has a different perceptive on it. Like, I’m not that stressed about exams at the moment because of the situation that I’m in.

I’ll tell you some of the things that my view has been changed on:

  • Relationships
  • Trust
  • Future

Deep right? I kinda want to just type it all out on this blog and be like ‘look at how much people fuck me up’ but it’s not fair on them.

I’m lucky to have my mum and Reece (and a few others) in my life because whenever I spend time with them, my life feels a little normal again.

It’s hard to remember how free I felt from the back of my mind 2 weeks ago and how happy, which I probably didn’t think as happy, I was then.

I’m finding it hard at school recently. I think it’s because I look at people around me, laughing and having a pretty alright life, wishing I was them. However, I know people are going/went through shitter times than me so I feel a bit guilty to complain. But I need to just type it out.

I can’t really concentrate on a lot of things like school and this blog but I know in a month or so, I’ll be coping enough to be able to concentrate fully. This shitty month or so is the only excuse I have for not blogging.

As well, I don’t know when I’m going to be fully alright again and writing daily so I’m sorry

Astrid xxx




22 thoughts on “perspective

  1. Really hope you are ok X I’m not going to go on about my sympathy to you because I know that can make people feel worse. I just want to let you know that there is someone out there hoping you are ok. I love your blog but I would rather you be ok and posting less than posting more and you hurting. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Babe Ily so much and what you’re going through does suck. And it’s ok to feel that way. What your going through I can even imagine. You’re always welcome to chat with me about And and I’m literally asking and begging my parents to let me fly to London in the next year so we can finally meet ❤ xx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This my first time reading your blog, and i got to say dat its cool…..concerning what you facing now,i’ll tell you to be cool and focus on the greatness that lies ahead, always remain happy, it helps

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh no, I’m so sorry to hear you’re having a rough time of it😔 Take care and stay strong❤ And it’s perfectly reasonable you’ll be taking a blogging break! You’ve got to put yourself first xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I always find that whenever something big in my life happens (eg. I have a fight with a friend) my perspective changes on everything and I realise and learn things about myself and about them. Hopefully you’ll be able to grow from whatever you might be going through right now.


  6. I love these type of posts Astrid but if you just realise how much there is to know about yourself that you can’t search up on Google. Hopefully you’ll be able to grow from whatever you are going through or at least make it better.


  7. Hey, I just wanted to say how I love the way you put yourself out there it is really amazing. Also when anxiety gets too strong and you get overwhelmed and completely consumed with emotions try this;
    Breath deeply ( This can be hard to do so shut your eyes and focus)
    Then imagine your mind is a whiteboard and you have to try and paint it black until there is no longer white and you are completely in a black void. This may seem a little weird but trust me it will calm you and it will kind of put your mind in order for a little while, all of those traveling thoughts won’t be so unbearable for a little while.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. personally i don’t think you should feel guilty to complain because complaining can be an egoic concept on one end of the spectrum but your on the other end of the spectrum. you only complain when you have a good reason, you don’t complain for the sake of complaining which a lot of people do


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