To anyone who has ever felt alone, like there is no one and that they feel like it will never get better or they will never be loved or have friends or have a home or have a future.
I was one of them.
You feel like that nobody will understand;that they will find you stupid or over reacting. So you don’t tell anyone.Of course, some people won’t understand you and think you naive and attention seeking. But there will be some people (at least one, I understand), that will get you who have been in the same kinda situation that you have found yourself in and you can’t seem to get yourself out of. You feel lost in this plain white box. It’s closing onto you.
Picture it. You’re in a white plain box and it’s closing onto you. What do you do? Do you just let it squash you? Or will you try and fight for maybe a little bit of the feeling of hope?
Well I was in that box and I nearly gave up. I sat down and waited for it. I sat there for a year or two. Just waiting for it to come. To feel the life going and for me to be free. But that didn’t happen. People noticed and helped to destroy that box. At first, it didn’t help at all;not even a crack. But then, by little by little, the box got a scar. A bit of hope. And that hope then turned it into a small hole in the wall which got bigger and bigger.
People started going into that room;people I cared about. I had company and that little white box didn’t feel so lonely. The walls got a bit of colour and it didn’t feel so boring. But I was still in that box and sometimes, even today, I find myself in that box.
Everyone has a box. Some may be more colourful, some may be more blank, some may be more crowded, some may be empty, some may have a door, some may might not even have a crack in the wall but everyday boxes change depending on the person.
That box can’t really be changed by anyone else. The only person who can change it is you. You can decide if to change it. You can decorate it if you try. You can whisper against the walls to talk to another person on the other side.
It will be difficult. It’s not going to be easy. You will probably want to let it close in. But look, what’s the point in letting it end you now? You can spend as much time on the other side when you can. But look, you have a life and that life is a gift so use it.
People will know how you feel. You will just have to look for them
Hideaway Girl xxx